Matam (a gathering of mourners): mourning rulings

المَأْتَم

Matam, in lexicon, is a gathering of men and women in sorrow or joy, later restricted to women gathering for a death; the jurists define it as people gathering at a death ¹. Condolence (ta'ziya) is narrower: an urging to patience and consolation of the bereaved ¹. The Shafi'is, Hanbalis and many later Hanafis dislike the matam, meaning the family sitting to receive mourners, since it renews grief and imposes costs ². The Malikis and some Hanafis allow sitting for condolence; the Malikis dislike women gathering to weep in private and forbid it aloud, and the Hanafis allow men to sit for three days after a death, though this is less preferred, and forbid women to sit ³.